tw: depression, panic attack, anxiety

Emotions on the tip of my tongue

Struggle to spill out

But words weren't found

Dead silence, no sound

Alone and alone and alone in a crowd

I want to scream, bare out my heart

But a choke in my throat

Nothing comes out, just silence

In someone I search for reliance

But I buried my screams, somewhere remote

I have people to help, I push them away

I say that it's all for you

But you know it's you I need

No on gloom I feed

I fake laughs and I know it, and I know that you know it too

I'm trapped in a cage, it's walls so tall

Can't jump over too huge

I wish to cry but I muffle my sobs

Nothing remains, just a heart throb

I have no one to go, no place to take refuge

I know that I made some mistakes

But now again, who doesn't

Fallen but I am, can't stand

Maimed, scarred and I got bleeding hands

I guess my strength was a myth,as tough it seems I wasn't

How do I say, it cannot be put in words

You won't understand

and I can't explain

Can't say a word without sounding insane

At the end it's just me and my choke that stand.